Dick Van Dyke Show - Season 4 - IV

Young man with a Shoehorn - **
Plot: Buddy and Rob invest in a shoe store and have to deal with salesman who's rude to Laura and Millie

Best Buddy Insult: I knew it the minute I saw a guy with a head like a light bulb, it was bound to light up

Another filler episode. The snarky Jewish shoe salesman (the wonderful Milton Frome) is a delight. but he's only onscreen for about 6 minutes. The rest of episode is dreary and very forgettable. Low point? Buddy/Rob try to sell shoes in a tired, very routine, comedy bit. Also bringing down the average: Lou Jacobi playing his standard "Lovable Guy" . This guy always reminds me of an cloying, overly sweet bit of cotton candy. Oh, and there's lot of Mille.

My Two showoffs and Me **
Rob thinks having a reporter watching himself, Buddy, Sally in action will be a disaster, and yep, boy is Rob right.

This episode shows up two common flaws of the show.

• The meat of the episode, the actual funny part (Sally/Buddy showboating for the writer) is only 6 minutes. The remaining 19 minutes is a long setup and a long last act. A modern comedy would oncentrate on the funny part, and shorten everything else. I've seen this same pattern in many episodes. No doubt it was due to churning out 31 episodes a year. The attitude seems to have been: "we've put enough comedy in this one, its good enough - lets move on".
• Morey Amsterdam's lack of acting ability - when he's annoyed and shouting at Rob, its not in a comic way, its too real. You need to be a good comic actor to be funny/angry and Amsterdam isn't.

Girls will Be Boys *
When Ritche is beaten up by a girl. Rob and Laurie must decide to let him fight back or stand by the rule of "Never hit a girl"

Best Buddy one-liner: Gee, when I was a little kid there was one girl who beat me up all the time. Really, who? My mother.

Ugh, a Ritche episode. Usually, this would be zero stars, but I give it a one * due to the Guest star: British actor Bernard Fox, who's quite amusing as Pricillia's father. Further, Rob/Laura get most of the screentime, not Ritchie. The situation is extremely dated, as the Petrie's over-the-top obsession with "Don't hit a girl -ever" doesn't exist today, assuming it ever did. If 40 years ago a girl tried to beat me up, my parents would've had the common-sense reaction:. Defend yourself. They wouldn't have thought twice about it.

Anothy Stone **
Rob and Buddy uncover a shocking secret about Sally's rich boyfriend and must decide whether to tell her.

Rob's Best Line: Buddy, we have no right to pry into Sally's private business. It's just not right.
Besides, Laura's pumping her right now.

Another "A Sally love affair gone wrong", but better than usual. Faint praise indeed. The first 15 minutes are about Laura/Buddy/Rob trying to find out more Anthony Stone. And then we find out why Sally has been so closed-mouth: He's an undertaker. Its only at the end that Sally is told the 2nd uncovered secret: Stone is alredy married. Sally takes it with good humor. We get very few scenes between Stone and Sally. Thank God.

Bupkis - ** 1/2
Rob gets upset when hears one of his old songs on the radio. It seems he may have given away all his rights

Highlight: The weather song. Nighttime, daytime, summertime, wintertime, it's always time for the weather. Weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather, weather. Nighttime, daytime, summertime, wintertime.

I'm ambivalent about this one. Gave it two-and-a-half stars but was thinking about two. An uneven episode full of good and bad. The story idea is good, Rob has given away his rights to an old song, now a hit, to his old co-writer "Jazz Potter". Did "Jazz" trick him? If so, should Rob sue? We get a good setup, and some good interaction between Rob/Laura and Buddy/Sally over what to do. "Butkis" itself is suitably absurd and comically bad. And there's a hilarious satrical "Weather song" at the start.

But, the casting is terrible. The actor playing "Jazz" is incredibly annoying. I mean memorably, incedibly, fingernails on a chalk-board. annoying. And Garrett Morris isn't funny. Couldn't they have found a FUNNY black actor?

Further, the whole thing is padded out. Examples? Twice Rob gives us a long explaination as to what the word "Bupkis" means. In another scene, Rob beats around the bush for two minutes before telling Laura, he gave away the rights. Further, we get too much Ritchie. The scene in the Music business office isn't funny. And Jazz/Rob sing several unfunny songs. Bottom line: There are some good jokes, but we needed more of them.

Your Home Sweet Home is my Home - *
Rob tells his new accountant the story of how he and Laura found their new house.

Boring Millie-Jerry filler episode about the two families buying their houses in Westchester. Low on laughs. Padded out with the usual "Let me tell you the story why I..." setups/flashbacks. The only funny scene comes when the real estate agent (Stanley Adams) shows the Pretrie's the basement and tries to ignore the enormous Rock. Again, Jerry Paris is very bland, and Millie can get annoying fast.

Dick Van Dyke Show Season 4 - III

The Redcoats - **

Plot: Rob agrees to let a popular British singing duo hide-out at his home. But he's sworn to secrecy and fears touching off a Beatlemania-like fan frenzy.

A missed opportunity. Its a funny situation but the comic pontential is wasted by some very dull substandard writing, lots of padding, and a sluggish plot. We get too many screaming girls, and too much of "Chad and Jeremy" - who are only midly amusing. You need more than a comic situation and good comedic actors, you need funny jokes too. I was hitting the FF button on this one.

Stacey Petrie Part I and Part II *
Rob's Brother Stacey  shows up and is nervous about meeting  a new girl Julie.  In part II, Stacey tells Julie about the author of her love letters from "Jim,"  while his new nightclub's success lies in the balance.

Two badly written episodes designed to highlight Jerry Van Dyke - Dick's real life brother. Extremely dull.  I was never a fan of Jerry Van Dyke, and he's the star of these two episodes. Rob and Laura take a backseat.  Lowlights? Herman and Jerry stage an extremely long, unfunny "Fight",  Sally teaches Jerry how to romance a girl, Jerry opens his heart to "rich girl" Julie.  I could name more.  Summary: Hard Pass.  

Boy No.  1 and Boy No. 2 *
Millie and Laura become two terrible stage-mothers when Rob agrees to hire sons Ritchie and Freddie for a commercial directed by Mel Cooley.

Best Buddy insult:  Your hats not on wrong, your head is on backwards.

Other than some Buddy one-liners, there's only one funny moment,  Mel comes in the office wearing sunglasses and a "Director's hat". Otherwise, this was pure torture.  Standard Sitcom plot, Ritchie,  way too much Millie, and Laura acting way out of character as an interfering stage mother.  IMDB voters rate it the 11th worst episode. 

Brother, can you spare $2,500  *

When Rob loses the show's script in Grand Central Station, a Hobo finds it, and holds it for ransom. 

Best Mel Insult:  Y'know the problem with Buddy? One day he's here...and the next day he's here. 

Dull story + mediocre jokes + unfunny guest stars =  tedious sitcom.  Totally paint-by-the-numbers. Even worse, one-note johnny Herbie Faye shows up as the "funny" lost and found attendent.  The story is unbelievable and could only exist in 60s sitcom land.  Why would Rob take the only copy of the script home with him?  And the bum is witty and generous. And looks good in a suit. 

The Impractical Joke - **

After Buddy plays a practical joke on Rob, he expects Rob to launch a counter-attack. But the longer Rob waits, the more paranoid Buddy becomes.

Good lord, this did not age well. Its a standard 1960s sitcom trope: someone plays a practical joke and then the victim gets his revenge.  Cue Laughter.  Here's its Buddy and Rob.  Problems:

• Buddy's practical joke (which takes the first 10 minutes) isn't funny or believable.  It depends on Rob being a complete idiot.  
• The ending revenge Joke by Rob is predictable and unfunny.  You can only laugh if you imagine Buddy is a complete idiot.  
• Buddy's "funny friend" (Lennie Weinrib) isn't funny.  He's obnoxious.  And weird looking.
• Morey Amsterdam isn't much of an actor.  Paranoid Buddy is pretty much like Regular Buddy.

This episode had me looking at my watch.  Was it really only 25 minutes? It seemed like 45. 

The Case of the Pillow -  *

Rob cries fowl when he takes a shady salesman to court for selling Laura smelly feather pillows.

Another standard 60s sitcom plot. Our main lead takes someone to court and thinks he's Perry Mason, while the gruff no-nonsense judge tries to set him straight.  Here the judge is played by Ed Bergley, who does well as anyone can with such a stock character.  Probably 15 minutes takes place in the courtroom,  10 minutes outside of it. 

Otherwise, there's not much to say. Alvy Moore (Mr. Kimball) does nothing funny and I was shocked at how many times the characters say: "Wow, this pillow smells" - cue laughtrack.  The writers really phoned this one in.  A lazy unfunny script with a few courtroom jokes - none of them original.  

DIck van Dyke Show - Season 4 - Part II

 The Alan Brady Show Goes to Jail- **1/2

Plot: Rob, Laura, Sally, Mel and Buddy visit Lyle in Prison and put on a show

Episode Highlight:  Rob and Laura sing a duet:  "I've got your number"

I gave this 2 1/2 stars because the last 10 minutes is very good.  The rest isn't.  A follow-on to  the previous episode "4 1/2".  In the first 15 minutes,  we get Don Rickles playing  "Lyle" the schlub character and Rob mistakenly put behind bars.  Its all pretty tedious.  However, the episode recovers in the last act,  as they get on stage and start performing.  Amsterdam tells jokes and plays the Cello,  Sally sings a torch song, and Rob/Laura sing/dance. You have to wonder why Carl Reiner didn't give MTM/Van Dyke more musical numbers. Maybe it was the expensive song rights.  

Three Letters from One Wife. ***
When Rob convinces a reluctant Alan Brady to do a highbrow documentary, Millie helps out by writing fan letters.  Except, the letters arrive before the show airs.  

This synopsis exagggerates Millie role in the episode. Its really about  Mel and Rob's interactions with Alan Brady.

 Its an extremely well-written episode, with Reiner - for once - dong a good job as the insecure, egotistical Brady.  No doubt because Reiner is playing a comic character in a realistic manner and not trying to BE FUNNY.  Van Dyke hits it out of the park as he tries to tell Brady the truth and not get fired.  And the Mel-Alan Brady interaction, due to the writing, is  funnier than ususal. The only letdown is - as usual - Millie. She's supposed to be the  good-hearted but "Wacky Neighbor" who almost gets Rob fired - but comes off as a cartoon character.   And Ann Morgan Guilbert was always better in small doses. 

Pink Pills and Purple Parents - *** 

Rob recalls when Laura took a tranquilizer prescribed for Millie before meeting Rob's parents for the first time, with disastrous results.

MTM is simply fantastic in this one, as she plays a "drunk" Laura at a dinner party for Rob's Parents.  There's a lot of physical comedy by both Rob and MTM and its great. Tom Tully (cf: Caine Mutiny) , of all people, shows up at Rob's dad.  His mother is played by 75 y/o Isabel Randolph! Both are very good.  The dinner party is book-ended (aka padded out) by scenes with Rob, Sally, and Buddy and can be skipped. 

Note: This show is typical of 60s TV, where Valium/tranquilizers are treated as food for comedy. Most people knew nothing about them, and were naive about the damage they could do.  In the case, Millie has a whole bottle of pills, and Laura takes 2-3 instead of just one. Even worse, she has wine too.  But the show treats it all as a harmless joke. 

It Wouldn't Hurt Them to Give Us a Raise -  **

Sally and Buddy go on strike. Rob, speaking on their behalf for raises, gets a bewildering introduction to Alan's convoluted corporate structure.must figure out how to handle it. 

Best Buddy Insult:   Not Bad for a self-taught incompetent

This is better than I expected.  First, the great Roger Carmel shows up and does a funny 5 Minute segment as Alan Brady's accountant. And there's a very good scene with MTM and Van Dyke as they figure out  how to keep Buddy/Sally happy.  But after that (the 16 minute mark) its all downhill  as the episode drags along to its predictable conclusion. Rob decides to quit if Sally/Buddy don't get a raise, etc.  Yawn. 

The Death of the Party -  **1/2

Rob struggles to hide the severe symptoms of a flu virus at a family party for Laura's relatives rather than admit she was right against him golfing earlier that morning in damp conditions.

Highlight:  A sick Rob tries to play Charades

Not much to say about this one.  Van Dyke and MTM are very good and the episode highlights their excellent chemistry.  The story isn't much. Its basically Rob trying to hide he's ill while helping Laura throw her party.  Pleasant but forgettable. 

Stretch Petrie vs. Kid Schnek-  **

Neil Schenk, a manipulative old pal of Rob's, shows up to milk him for repayment of a favor done long ago.

Typical Jack Carter one-liners: "80 percent of the money is spent by women," Carter observed  "The other 20% is spent by men--on women!"  And: "If you like to spend your vacation in out-of-the-way places where few people go, let your wife read the map,"

Filler episode with a standard Sitcom plot.  Jack Carter guest stars. 

Like Don Rickles, Carter was a successful night-club comedian who constantly appeared on TV shows and Late Nite talk in the 60s and 70s.  Also, like Rickles, he wasn't much of a comedic actor, with little range.  Here, he's given plenty of jokes, but the brash one-liners wear thin fast.  

Carter's problem, and it was a factor in his lack of relative success,  is his agressiveness isn't tempered by much charm or likablity. And the "old friendship" between him and Dick van Dyke is completely unbelievable.  IMDB voters give this an astoundingly  low  6.7 rating, making it the 7th least favorite episode.  Its not that bad, but its not that good either. 

Dick Van Dyke Show - Season 4

My Mother Can Beat Up My Father - ***1/2
Plot: When Laura beats up a barrom drunk, Rob feels his manhood is under assault. A hilarious, well written episode, that gives us lots of interaction between Laura and Rob and some good physical comedy.

The Ghost of A. Chantz **1/2
Rob, Laura, Buddy and Sally spend the night in a seemingly haunted cabin. A well regarded episode (IMDB 9.0 rating ), I was bored by the endless, corny, "I'm so scared" reaction shots. Plus, there's a lot of Buddy/Sally in this one. And that's never a good thing. But it has its moments. 

The Lady and the Babysitter. *
A HS student developes a crush on Laura and she and Rob help him find a gril his own age. Good God, we've seen this sitcom plot recycled in endless TV shows. Even worse, the guest star (Eddie Hodges) is mediocre and so is the writing. 

A Vigilante Ripped My Sports Coat.  *

After a fight, Jerry and Rob aren't speaking to each other . Laura tries to patch things up with a dinnner invitation but instead makes things worse. 

One weakness of the Dick Van Dyke show was the supporting cast.  Their range was limited, and they rarely improved the material.  And Millie and Jerry weren't funny (Jerry Paris in particular). Unfortunately, this is Millie/jerry episode and its snoozeville . As for the plot: both Rob and Jerry act incredibly stupid.  I don't know what's more absurd,  Jerry childishly going to destroy his neighbor's crabgrass without permission, or Rob's over-the-top self-righteous oppposition.  I love Lucy did this fighting neighbors thing first - and much better.

The Man from Emperor - *

 Drew Patton (Hugh Heffner) offers Rob a job at Emperor (Playboy) magazine and shows him the advantages of the "Emperor Lifestyle" to Laura's disapproval.

In the mid-60s Playboy magazine was much more classy and circumspect than it latter became and Heffner was often on TV, selling his "Playboy" philosophy. Stay single boys and live the high life. Today, we know the real Heffner was  a complete slimeball and  his "philosophy" a fraud.  

Accordingly, its rather creepy to see how positive  the episode portrays the sleazy Drew.  And the situation is incredibly dated. I usually give old TV shows/Movies a generous pass on their old timey values and mores but today we live in such a different world, its impossible to see "Playboy" in a postive light.  Other demerits? The guest star is a bore, and the writing is dull. 

Romance, Roses and Rye Bread -  ZERO

When Bert, the jocular Deli man, expesses his love, Sally must figure out how to handle it. 

The guest star - Sid Melton - is simply awful. Even worse, we get another standard "Sally's love affair gone wrong" story. Rose Marie was incredibly talented, but the writers never seemed to use her talents properly.  They just gave her this sorta crap. The Worst Season 4 episode so far.

4 1/2 -  **

Rob relays the story of how he befriended Lyle - man who tried to rob them in a stuck elevator

Best Budddy Joke:  Mel, while we're up there [in prison], maybe we can get your hair out of solitary.

For once, I can't complain about the Guest star quality because its Don Rickles. The king of insult comics used to guest star a lot in the 1960s before launching numerous failed 70s sitcoms in the 1970s. Sometimes he was good (cf: Get Smart), sometimes he wasn't.  It all depended on the script. 

Here he's given the ridiculous role of a likable but incompetent stick-up artist . (Why would anyone rob someone in an office elevator in broad daylight?)  Rickle's doesn't really fit the part. His comedy was based on being brash, energetic, and insulting. But he's not terrible in the role. Its the script that lets him down.  Once the elevator stops, we trudge along to the end with all the standard sitcom tropes and jokes.  A meh episode.  

Top 25 Star Trek episodes (orignal series)

 

1. All our yesterdays
2. Amok Time
3. Arena
4. Balance of Terror
5. Bread and Circuses
6. Corbanite maneuver 
7. City on the edge of Forever
8. Devil in the Dark
9. Elanne of Troyius
10. Doomsday machine 
11. Errand of Mercy
12. Galileo Seven
13. Journey to Babel
14. Menagerie
15. Mirror, Mirror
16. Obsession 
17. Patterns of Force
18. Piece of the Action
19. Space Seed
20. Spectre of the gun
21. Tholian web
22. Tomorrow is yesterday
23. Troubles with Tribbles
24. Where no man has gone before
25. Ulimate Computer

Star Trek - Voyager Season 1 and Season 6

Was going to write a episode by episode review, but after watching two seasons, I changed my mind. I just don't care enough. This was the next Star Trek series after DS9, and was produced by the same producers: Rick Berman and Michael Piller,  Like DS9, we have a very diverse, ensemble cast, including:

1. Janeway - Female captain
2. Tuvak - black Vulcan Security officer
3. Torres - female half-klingon/half-Human - Chief Engineer
4. The Doctor - Bald Medical Hologram
5. Neelix - Bald Talaxian Hybrid - Navigator
6. Tom Paris - Helmsman
7. Chakotay - Native American First Officer
8. Kes/Seven of Nine - Female Space Aliens
9. Harry Kim - Operations Officer

Unlike DS9, I didn't find the characters engaging. The actors were good, but there's no standout character like Picard or Odo/Quark/Kira.  The stories were well written, but often seemed like retreads of previous Star Trek episodes.

Summary: A fine star trek show, but not my cup of tea. I'll stick to TNG, TOS and DS9.  While I like Star Trek, - I'm not a Trekkie. 

TOS Season 3 - The Fred Freiberger Episodes

People often assume Fred Freiberger was solely responsible for all 24 Season 3 TOS episosdes. Its true that as Producer, Freiberger was ultimatly responsible for hiring (firing) the Director, the casting, and the final script, but the  original story outlines weren't all his creation. He seems to been responsible for the following TOS Season 3 episodes from the start to finish:

1. All Our Yesterdays
2. Cloud Minders
3. Lights of Zetar
4. Mark of Gideon
5. Plato's stepchildren
6. Requiem For Methusala
7. Whom the God's Destroy
8. World is Hollow and I touched the Sky

In addition, he massively revised two D.C. Fontana stories (causing her to take her name off the credits)  and  Freiberger deserves all the praise (or blame) :

1. That which survives
2. Way to Eden

 Finally,  three original scripts from outside authors were selected by Bob Justman and approved by Freiberger (and Roddenberrry) for production.  They deserve to be called "Bob Justman episodes" since he's the one that found the scripts and helped shepard the writers through the process.  But Fred deserves PARTIAL credit:

1. The Empath
2. Is There no Truth in Beauty
3. Tholian Web

The other eleven Season 3 episodes originated with Gene Roddenberry, although  approving the original story outline was often all he did. 

TOS Season 3 - The Almost Good Episodes

 These are the four TOS Season 3 episodes that contained some good things, but are weighed down by some parts that were truly awful.

Way to Eden:  8 minutes of horrible "space rock" plus another 8 minutes of a boring Checkov romance. The other 34 minutes aren't bad.  The badness starts at the 11:00 minute mark, and goes on for another 5 minutes.  Then goes off the rails again at the 24:00 minute mark till the 35:00 minute mark,  

Spock's Brain:  We get an interesting first 21 minutes. But the second the elevator reaches the ground floor its snoozeville for the next 15 minutes. This is where we get lots of boring fights, and lines like "Brain? What is Brain?".  Its not till Zombie Spock releases the "Pain belts" that the episode gets back on track. The ending surgery wth McCoy is quite well done. 

That which Survives - In terms of rewatchability the first 15 minutes are at the bottom of the TOS episode rankings. Its not till D'Amoto dies, that it starts to get interesting.  Before that its just exposition and padding.  By starting to watch after his death, you miss nothing. The rest of the episode is well done.

Plato's Stepchildren:  This episode has more bad mixed in with the good than any other TOS episode. We get 14 minutes of completely unwatchable "torture porn".  Bascially, two 7 minute long segments, one in the second act, and one in the last act. If this isn't bad enough, the first 6 minutes are boring exposition.  Its not till Parmen becomes delerious and things start flying around that it becomes interesting. Now, on first watch its not uninteresting,  but once you watch it once,  the only thing you can do is is FF through these 20 minutes, and watch the remaining 30 minutes. 

Star Trek Discovery - Season 1

Well, I gave it a chance. I was very impressed with the set design, special effects, makeup, and overall look of the show. If only TOS, could've had this kind of technology and special effects back in the 1960s! Unforturnately, STD is all sizzle and no steak. The characters were bland or unlikable, the dialogue forgettable, and the stories just aveage. So, I lost interest fast. I can only sit through so many "cool" special effects and explosions before I get bored.

But I'm not the target audience.
I'm not just talking about Teenagers and young adults. Hollywoods sells its movies/TV shows to the whole world now. And young people around the world want action and "cool special effects". And there's no sense writing great English language dialogue, when it'll be dubbed in Chinese or German.

And the actors didn't make much of an impression. But actors have to work with what's on the page. And they didn't get much. 

So, its back to watching "Old" star trek for me.

TOS - Season 1 - Ranking

 Excellent

1. Balance of Terror
2. Corbanite maneuver 
3. City on the edge of Forever
4. Menagerie

Very Good

1. Arena
2. Conscience of a King
3. Devil in the Dark
4. Enemy within
5. Errand of Mercy
6. Galileo Seven
7. Shore Leave
8. Space Seed
9. Tomorrow is yesterday
10. Where no man has gone before
11. What are little girls made of?

Good

1. A taste of Armageddon
2. Charlie X
3. Court Martial
4. Dagger of the  mind
5. The Man Trap
6. Miri
7. Mudd's women
8. Naked Time
9. Operation Annialate
10. Squire of Gothos
11. This Side of paradise

Average

1. Return of the Archons

The Worst

1. Alternative Factor

TOS Season 2 - Ranking

Excellent

1. Amok Time
2. Doomsday machine 
3. Mirror, Mirror
4. Troubles with Tribbles

Very Good

1. Bread and Circuses
2. Gamesters of Triksolian
3. Immunity Syndrome 
4. Journey to Babel
5. Metamorphosis
6. Obsession 
7. Patterns of Force
8. Piece of the Action
9. Private Little war
10. Return to Tomorrow
11. Ultimate Computer

Good

1. Assignment earth
2. By Any other name
3. Cats-paw
4. changling
5. Deadly years 
6. Friday's Child
7. I, Mudd
8. Omega Glory 
9. Wolf in the fold 

Average

1. The Apple
2. Who mourns for Adonis

TOS - The Apple

Plot:  When Kirk and a landing party visit Gamma Trianguli VI they find innocents who  worship an all-powerful God - and danger.

Time hasn't been kind to The Apple. A fairly expensive episode, it offered (for the 60s) cutting edge special effects, unusual makeup and extensive set design. We also get a lot of action. Sadly in 2022, the sets looks incredibly fake, as do the "landmines" and "Killer flowers". And we no longer can suspend disbelief when American actors in tan makeup are presented as primitive space aliens. 

Also, the story is far too familiar. Once again, as in the "The Last of the Archons", we have an all-power computer/mechanical being that runs a "Utopia". A once again, Kirk has to destroy it, because its threatening the USS Enterprise.

With all that said, "The Apple" isn't that bad. We get some great Spock-McCoy byplay, some funny lines (hat tip Gene Coon), some Checkov romance, and some good action sequences. The story drags at times, but its watchable.

Best Quote

McCoy: Jim, you're not just going to stand by and be blinded to what's going on here. These are humanoids, intelligent. They need to advance and grow. Don't you understand what my readings indicate? There's been no progress here in at least ten thousand years. This isn't life. It's stagnation.

Spock: Doctor, these people are healthy and they are happy. What ever you choose to call it, this system works, despite your emotional reaction to it

McCoy: It might work for you, Mister Spock, but it doesn't work for me. Humanoids living so they can service a hunk of tin.

Kirk: Gentlemen, I think this philosophical argument can wait until our ship's out of danger..

Summary: Currently ranked as the 8th worst episode on IMDB, the problem with The Apple isn't that its terrible - its that so many other Star Trek Episodes are better. It has flaws, but its not mind-numbing boring like Mark of Gideon, or annoying like And the Children shall Lead. Its just very, very average.

TOS - The Empath

Plot: Trapped in an alien laboratory, Kirk, Spock and McCoy meet an empath and are involved in a series of experiments.

Pros: Acting, Ending, Some good drama, Dialogue, minimalist set, Guest star
Cons: Slow moving, not enough story or action. Villians aren't logical

Favorite Quote
McCoy: Men weren't intended to live this far underground. It's just not natural.
Kirk: And space travel is?
Spock: Some men spend the majority of their lives in mines beneath the surface.
McCoy: I'm a doctor, not a coal miner.

De Forrest Kelly's Favorite
This was supposedly De Forsest Kelly's favorite episode, and its easy to see why. The set is a darkened sound stage with the guest stars and "The big three". The focus in on the acting, and Dr. McCoy gets a lot of screen time. And he gets to be the hero and show a wide range emotions, instead of just being cantankerous or trading barbs with Spock.

Almost a Great Episode
The Empath was one rewrite away from being a great Star Trek episode. While the acting, script, and Guest star, are good there's not enough story. The plot moves at a snails pace. Its a great 35 mintues, but the show is 50 minutes long.

Its one Star Trek episode that needed a "B" plot. Or maybe more action. Maybe "our guys" could have escaped from the undergound facility and the aliens had trouble reacapturing them. Of course, that would've cost more $$ and that would've gone against the whole goal of making a low budget episode.

Summary:
Anyway, the episode needed an exciting 10 minutes in the middle. And it didn't get it. However, its not that bad on DVD, since I could FF and focus on the best parts, which are very good indeed. But given the drawn out plot, I can't rate it more than average.

TOS Podcasts - Reviewing the Reviewers

As I've been watching Star Trek - the original series, I've been listening to various podcasts that go over the episodes. I've found several that standout:

1. Fascinating - A star trek podcast
2. Mission Log - A Rod Roddenberry production
3. Enterprise Incidents - with Steve Morris and Scott Mantz.
4. Inglorious Trekspersts

Sadly, the rest of them (and there are a lot) are hit and miss. Overall, these 2nd tier podcasts, are much more critical and political then those mentioned above, and the IMDB comments. Or more accurately, more critical and political in a much less intelligent manner.

These 2nd teir podcasts, really, really, love pointing out "Sexism", "Racism" and "Jingoism", even when they have to stretch the meaning of those words a country mile. They also do the following:

• constantly snark at what "a horn dog" Kirk is. Haha. There's Kirk making his moves on everything in a skirt - despite this being false.
• Miss the meaning of episode dialogue and can't place the situations in context
• Talk about how "boring" somethng is, without support
• Don't understand its a TV show and is supposed to be entertaining - not a science lesson or character study.
• Think pointing out minor inconsistencies and plot holes is important and interesting
• Don't like all that icky romance stuff (most podcasters are male nerds)
• Ignore the quality of the set design, music, writing or direction.
• Constantly snark about the acting being "Cheesy" and "over-the-top"
• Don't get the Humor and take the jokes literally
• Confuse the actor with the Character.  
• Think the 1960s and the 1950s are the same in terms of culture and sexual attitudes
• Thunder about how "Personally offended" they are by some mild instance of "sexism" or "colonalism". Thankfully, they don't cry on-air.

Part of them problem, is they don't know anything except TV shows or SF/fantasy.  Classical movies (let alone Classical literature) is a closed book to them. 

Many seem to think Critical analysis consists in combing through a TV show and pointing out all the violations against the polticially correct views in the current year.  One half expects them to denounce something as "Counter-revolutionairy" or "a poltical belief of the Bourgoise".  Its sometimes that goofy and stalinist. 

The old-time attitude of being broad-minded and welcoming different viewpoints/values is gone. Instead, these podcasters proudly (or in anger)  announce how OFFENDED they are at some line of dialogue.  Others use words like "icky" or "bizarre" to describe something that differs from their cultural values. How dare Kirk, compliment a women! That's intolerable! 

TOS - Omega Glory

Pros:  Good acting, Great Villian, lots of action, interesting ideas, fast paced 

Cons: Too many fights, Another Planet too much like Earth, Shatner reading the US Constitution

Best Quote:

SIRAH: Yes, it is written. Good shall always destroy evil.

MCCOY: Spock, I've found that evil usually triumphs unless good is very, very careful.

CLOUD: Hoola!

MCCOY: Spock, we've got to do something!

SPOCK: I am open to suggestions, Doctor.

Omega Glory is an action packed Star Trek episode with Morgn Woodward, a very good guest star. For the first 3 acts, its tightly-written, and full of interesting (if not fully developed) ideas. And then comes the 4th act, and things sorta go wrong. Unbelievably, we learn the savage "Yangs" (in terms of their beliefs) are almost carbon copy Americans, down to their flag, Pledge of Alligence and the US Constitution.

Yet the Episode is Vastly Underrated

Omega glory is currenly ranked on IMDB as the 5th worst TOS episode, right above, Spock's Brain, the way to eden, And the Children Shall Lead, and The Alternative factor. Non-Americans really  hate it, giving it a 5.9 IMDB Rating (US viewers give it a respectable 6.5). 

This is simply absurd. The episode is well-acted, action packed, well-directed, and fast-paced. At no time was I bored. The ending is weak (Shatner reads the Preamble to the US Constitution) and there are too many fist-fights but those are the only real criticisms I have. I'd rate it a 7.0. 

The situation from the Original Screenplay never fully spelt out,
You can glem this from screenplay. Somehow after the invention of space travel, both the Communist Chinese, and the USA, colonized the same planet. A war broke out using nuclear and biological weapons. Over the passage of hundreds of years, the Yangs (aka the Yanks) reverted to savagery. The Coms (aka the Chinese Communists) became the more civilized village dwellers and got the upper hand. But when Star Fleet show up, the savage Yangs, using "human wave" tactics are on the verge of conquering the last Com village.

The following lines were cut from final filmed episode:

McCoy: Jim, the parallel's too close. They seem so completely Human. Is it possible that... ?
Kirk: The result of Earth's early space race?
Spock: Quite possible, Captain. They are aggressive enough to be Human.
McCoy: Now listen, Spock, you...

It Played Better in 1968

Roddenberry, who wrote the script, is basically flipping the average American view of the Korean war, and on-going Vietnam war.  Instead, of backward poorly armed Chicoms and NVA attacking outnumbered, but technologically superior American forces and winning through sheer numbers, its the  Yangs "Hordes" using spear/lances to attack the more advanced Coms.  

Througout the episode, we're supposed to the side with the more civilized "Coms", and be fearful of the Yangs.  The fact that the "Coms" are placed by Asian actors, and the barbarian "Yangs" are played by white actors is supposed to show up racial predjudice, as does Kirk's ending comment that "We the People,  must apply to everyone or it means nothing!"   

Summary

While its understandable that non-USA viewers would be turned off by symbols of US Partiotism, that's a small part of the episode.  From reading some of the more hysterical critics, you'd think Captain Kirk spent the entire episode singing "God bless Ameica" and waving Old Glory.  Watching it, I was suprised how little partiotism we get.  It all comes at the end, and although the idea of a space alien having a US Constitution is quite silly, its no worse then a Roman Planet, a Greek planet, a Dakota-Navajo Indian planet, or a Chicago Gangster planet.

"Star Trek" is a mishmash of Science Fiction and Fantasy 

Time travel, mind swapping, all-powerful aliens who can ignore time and physics, and mirror universes are all fantasies.  And there are other questions: How can Spock knock people out with a "Vulcan Nerve pinch" or "read minds"?  How can  a ship travel at 10x or a 100x the speed of light? How can humanoids live 2,300 years? How can a transporter beam your atoms through  earth, steel or concrete? How can aliens turn the Enterprise into a toy and back again? How can everyone speak English? And so on.

Its amazing what SF fans will accept or reject as "unrealistic".  And explaining something as due to an  all-powerful, too advanced for us to understand, alien life form isn't science, its just magical thinking.   

TOS - Season 3 - Ranking

Very Good

1. All our yesterdays
2. Enterprise Incident
3. Elanne of Troyius
4. Spectre of the gun
5. Tholian web
6. Wink of an Eye
7. Turnabout Intruder
   

Good

1. Day of the Dove
2. Requiem for Methusela
3. Is there no Truth in Beauty?
4. Let this be your last battlefield
5. Savage curtain
6. The Empath

Average

1. Paradise Syndrome
2. For the world is hollow and I have touched the sky
3. Clound Minders
4. Whom The Gods Destroy

Below Average

1. That Which Survives
2. Spock's Brain
3. Way to Eden

The Worst

1. Mark of Gideon
2. Lights of zetar
3. And the Children Shall Lead
4. Plato's Stepchildren 

TOS - Paradise Syndrome

Plot: Kirk, suffering from from amnesia, finds romance and heartbreak on an alien planet peopled with the descendents of Native Americans.

Pros: Good script, shot on location, believable romance, good McCoy-Spock by-play, ending well done.
Cons: Hollywood "Indian" speak, mediocre supporting actors, somewhat predictable.

Paradise Syndrome is a well done Star Trek drama. Not an action-adventure. A drama. The action is limited. The Enterprise isn't going to blow up, Spock and McCoy aren't going to die, and phaser blasts and fist-fights are kept to a minimum. 

Instead, we focus on Kirk (forgetting he's Captain Kirk) living in an Indian village whose decendents were brought to the planet thousands of years ago by the "Providers". Taken for a God, he ends up romancing an Indian princess. Meanwhile, onboard the USS Enterprise, Spock and McCoy try to keep an asteroid from smashing into the planet.

A Believable Romance

Kirk is at the village for over 2 months, and as a result, his romance with Miramanee is believable, as is his love for her. When she dies, Kirk is quite rightly upset. What a change from Requiem for Methusala - where Kirk falls in love in 3 hours!

Pushed by Roddenberry.  Fred Freiberg wanted action adventure
While Roddenberry mostly was hands-off during 3rd season, he is responisble for this episode and many key changes to the story.  Fred Freiberg didn't like the original script, thinking it was too talky and didn't have enough action.  To Freiberg Star Trek was "Tits in space".  Roddenberry, however, liked the story (and the writer Margaret Armen) and forced Freiberg to produce it. 

So what's Wrong?

• The supporting actors playing the Indians are mediocre. Not bad, they just aren't memorable.
• The Indian dialogue is mediocre. Its difficult to write great dialogue for "primitive" people. They have to sound different, yet uneducated. So, you get a lot of short, declarative sentences.
• Kirk's "Story" is rather predictable. His advanced knowlegdge makes him the Medicine man. He falls in love with a beautiful Indian maiden, tragedy strikes and she dies. After all, we can't have Captain Kirk running around the Galaxy with his wife and Indian son.
• We needed more excitement. Not a lot - but some. At one point, things get so laid back, Kirk and his wife talk about the Lamp he invented and his irrigation project. Yawn. Character development? Yes. Putting me to sleep? No.

Best Quote
MCCOY: Well, your Vulcan metabolism is so low it can hardly be measured, and as for the pressure, that green ice water you call blood
SPOCK: My physical condition is not important, Doctor. That obelisk is.
MCCOY: Well, my diagnosis is exhaustion brought on from overwork and guilt. You're blaming yourself for crippling this ship, just as we blamed you. Well, we were wrong. So were you. You made a command decision. Jim would have done the same. My prescription is rest, now. Do I have to call the security guards to enforce it?

Summary:  A good solid episode.  Gets better on rewatch. 

TOS - That Which Survives

There's not much to say about "That which survives". Its a mildly entertaining, if forgettable, action-filled episode. Lee Meriweather is killing people, the Enterprise commanded by Spock is about to blow up, and Kirk, McCoy, and Sulu are trying to stay alive on a barren, uninhabitated planet.

Several points:

1) Spock really needs McCoy or Kirk to play off. Here, he just has Scotty, and in order to generate some interest Spock is super-sarcastic and logical. Its good as far as it goes, but there's not much tension. Spock figures out how to save the ship, and Scotty does it.

2) The planet scenes are too low-budget with too many fake rocks. This is one episode that should have been shot on location.  Roddenberry wondered why a wind machine wasn't used (as it was in Specter of the Gun) to make the planet more "alien".

3) It also needed much better direction. It seems that Director Wallerstein wasn't really that talented, but got selected because he always came under budget. Having the writer John Meridith Lucas as director might have improved things.

4) This has the worst supporting TOS cast, I've ever seen. Sulu and McCoy need to be replaced since they're trapped on the planet. And who do we get? Unattractive, charisma-free replacements. The new helmswoman is horsefaced and can't act. McCoy's replacement is no great shakes either. And yes, and its nice to have an increased minority presence, but going from just Uhura every week - to Uhura, a black doctor AND a black engineering assistant is jarring. We even get a "Dr. Sanchez"! 

Meanwhile D'mato, who beams down with Kirk, looks and sounds like a middle-aged NYC Deli worker. Why do we get this 50 y/o bald guy with a paunch, when everyone else on Star Trek is young and fit? He's not a good actor either.  Plenty of  good young Italian actors in 1969, why didn't they hire one?  Note: seems he was a friend of the producer. So he got the job!

5) Lee Meriweather does suprisingly well as the killer android. She's a killer with a heart of gold. She doesn't want to kill, but hey orders are orders.  The ending message was touching, and not in the original script.

6) Checkov given the week off.  And Bones might as well been. McCoy only has 41 lines and does nothing more than patch up Sulu, and ask Kirk "What do you think, Jim? "  

TOS - Wink of an Eye

Wink of an Eye is an above-average TOS epsisode that benefits from a great guest star. Kathie Browne absolutely nails it, as the "villian" Deela. TOS often lives and dies by its guest stars. Second-rate Jeff Corey helped ruined Cloudminders for me. But here, Browne makes Wink of an Eye very enjoyable. She brings the right amount of intelligence, playfulness, beauty, and strength to the role.

As for the story, its tightly written, but a rehash of other SF stories and previous Star Trek episodes. It  moves at a fast pace. Like Specter of the Gun (also based on a Gene Coon story outline) it shows that a low budget "Bottle episode" can be entertaining if done correctly.

I'd put it in the top 30 episodes of TOS.

Best Quote:

Kirk: Mr. Spock. My compliments to your repair work and yourself.

Spock: Thank you, Captain. I found it an accelerating experience.

TOS - The Cloudminders

Plot: The Enterprise arrives at Ardana to obtain "Zenite", the only cure for a plague on another planet. However, the troglodyte miners and the elite rulers in the beautiful cloud city of "Stratos" are locked in conflict. Can Kirk find a way to get the rare mineral in time to save millions?

Pros: Beautiful actresses and set design, not a bottle episode, philosophical plot, some Spock flirting, Kirk behaves like Kirk
Cons: Obvious message, weak villain, bad fights, static first half.

Cloudminders while average in execution is a welcome change from most of season 3. Finally, we're given a "new civilization" with some good set design. And we're not looking for Spock's brain, but following Kirk as he attempts to obtain a needed rare mineral and navigate the conflict between the "have-not" minors in revolt, and the upper-class cloud dwellers.

And Kirk is Kirk 

He's focused on the mission - not some beautiful android. Also nice are the two beautiful actresses. One, in a pretty blue dress, plays Plasus' daughter, and has some nice flirty moments with Spock. The other, is the tough resistance leader, battling for justice.

Substandard Jeff Corey as the villainous Plasus.
Corey simply doesn't have enough Charisma for the part. This guy is the leader of Stratos? I don't think so.   Corey is more of a  supporting actor, and playing against Shatner exaggerates his limitations.  Plus, he's far too old to be fighting with Kirk.

The talky over-obvious first half
While its enjoyable to visit Stratos and learn about their society, the first-half is far too talky and static. We pick up the situation fairly quickly: 

(1) the planet divided into workers and cloud people;

(2) Parus is prejudiced against the troglodytes; and 

(3) the workers are oppressed. 

But after these points are made, the first-half just drones on, with a needless torture scene and Plasus- Kirk arguments. Its not until the 3rd act, when Kirk decides to beam down to Vanna's prison cell, so she can help procure the Zinone gas, that the story starts moving again.  Albeit in a predictable direction.

The bad fights
The Director does a poor job with the two extended fights The one between Corey-Kirk is unbelievable, since Corey is too old and small. The beginning fight is poorly choreographed. Why Spock doesn't use his nerve pinch, and can't beat a 120 lbs girl isn't made obvious. Both lack any sense of danger and go on far too long. 

Best Quote

Droxine : You only take a mate once every seven years?

Mr. Spock : The seven-year cycle is biologically inherent in all Vulcans. At that time, the mating drive outweighs all other motivations.

Droxine : And is there nothing that can disturb that cycle, Mr. Spock?

Mr. Spock : Extreme feminine beauty is always disturbing, Madam.

Plasus : Gentlemen, one of our planet's most incomparable works of art: my daughter Droxine. 

Captain Kirk.  And First Officer Spock.

Droxine : I have never before met a Vulcan, sir.

Mr. Spock : Nor I a work of art, Madam.

Summary:  An average episode let down by some bad casting of the villian, and weak direction.  A message episode that needed less repetition and more wit.  However, the actresses are lovely, we get off the Enterprise, encounter a new world,  and the story is logical and mildly interesting.   

TOS - Lights of Zetar

Plot: Scotty's romance with a new Star Trek officer is interrupted when aliens attempt to take over her body. 

Pros:  Guest star looks good in a short skirt.  Memory Alpha,  Conference to solve the problem
Cons: Bad romance, dull guest star,  Scotty plays the fool,  another bottle episode, plodding story

Quite rightly considered one of TOS' worst episode, there's really nothing terrible about LOZ, its not And the Children shall Lead,  it just covers familar ground and is very mediocre. Designed to appeal to a female audience, we get some standard 3rd Season tropes;

• A plot centered on a female guest-star (Mira)
• A romance (this time with Scotty)
• Aliens taking over a human body
• A bottle episode 

The script is pedistrian and the execution is poor.   Scotty is written as a love-sick mooncalf,  Gushing over Mira, and being overly-protective. Its hard to believe this version of Scotty has ever seen a woman before. Mira, meanwhile,  never even smiles at him. Her love for Scotty only appears at the end.  And the two actors (Doohan and Jan Shutan) have zero chemistry. Its a very odd romance.  

And while Shutan isn't bad in the role,  Mira - as written - isn't particularly likable or interesting.  She snarks at McCoy, and is often strong-headed and egotistical for no reason.  And that's a big problem, because there's nothing in the story  itself that's interesting.  Shatner, Bones, and Spock, help solve the problem and "cure" Mira, but she's really the center of the story.  A space battle with the alien lights, and a few dead people on Memory Alpha are thrown in, to gin up the action,  

Typical Bad Scotty Dialogue

SCOTT: You're the sanest, the smartest, the nicest woman that has ever come aboard this ship.
MIRA: Anything else?
SCOTT: Anything else, I'll keep to myself for the moment.

And:

KIRK: Get to Sickbay, Lieutenant. That's an order.
MIRA: Yes, sir.
SCOTT: Captain, would it be all right if I went along to Sickbay?
KIRK: No, Mister Scott. Stay at your post for the moment.
SCOTT: But Captain

Summary:  "The Lights of Zetar" is so bland and boring its hard to write about.  A talky, talk fest on the Enterprise, it plods along from A to B.  The aliens aren't particulary interesting either,  they just want to live.  Nor is the resolution exciting or belivable.  Given all that, the central character Mira, needed to be something special - and she's not.  Skippable.  

TOS - Mark of Gideon

One of the best things about Star Trek, The Original Series, is that while its sometimes silly, its rarely boring. Unfortunately, Mark of Gideon is an exception. For what seems like the whole episode, we alternate between two situations. First, Spock on the Enterprise Bridge talking to the Gideon leader and getting the run around. Second, Kirk, on a duplicate empty Enterprise, wandering around with a confused blond woman seeking answers. Eventually, Spock beams down and we learn Kirk's kidnapping was related to Gideon's overpopulation problem.

Its incredibly static and talky. There's almost no action. Neither guest star (Sharon Acker or David Hurst) is charsimatic, and we never feel Kirk is in danger. On the plus side, there's no sadism or annoying child actors. That's the best I can say about it.

Best Quote:  

SPOCK: Diplomats and bureaucrats may function differently, but they achieve exactly the same results.

Summary: A forgettable episode, its all talk, none of it interesting. Usually, I go into more detail, or review the reviewers, but this episode is so dull, its not worth the effort.  Basically, the Producers wanted to fill time, spend as little $$ as possible, and push their  politics. One of Star Trek's worst.

TOS - Plato's Stepchildren

Plato's Stepchildren is a perfect example of why TOS Season Three was so terrible. We start off with an interesting concept. A group of Space Aliens, after a brief sojourn in Ancient Greece, settle on a new Planet. After 2,000 years, the Enterprise comes calling and meets these ageless "Greeks" with vast mental powers.

Plenty of possibilities here. 

How do they handle being almost immortal and ageless? What have they done with their vast amounts of free time, meditation, and study? How has Greek philosophy formed their society?

But We get none of that.

These "Ancient Greeks" are just shallow, arrogant, self-entitled jerks. And there's nothing "Ancient Greek" about them, except their customs and dress. They just as easily could've been 18th Century aristocrats or Romans.

And the entire episode consists of these "Greeks"  trying to force McCoy to stay behind, by subjecting Spock and Kirk to sadistic humilation and torture. Almost 13.5 mnutes of it.  Here's the breakdown:

12:00 to 12:30 - Kirk is forced by Parmen to slap himself for 30 seconds.

19:45 to 25:15 - Kirk is forced to sing/dance, be a horse, and grovel.  Spock is forced to sing/laugh.

38:45 to 45:15 - Spock is forced to sing to, kiss, and threaten Nurse Chapel.  Kirk does the same to Uhura, except no singing.  

It should be noted that the last two scences are accompanied by McCoy shouting for Parmen to stop it, while we get close-ups of Alexander (looking pained/disgusted) and Philania (amused or excited).  

The Simple simon plot 

Act I - Hello there earthlings, please save our leader, he's ill. Have you met Alexander? He's small and pathetic. We like to bully him.
Act II - Please don't go Doctor McCoy - otherwise we'll have to Kill/torture your friends
Act III - Torture and Humiliation of Spock, Kirk
Act IV - Oh no! Now, you're more powerful than we are. Don't punish us, we'll be good. Adios Captain Kirk!

Now, is the episode boring? Nope. Torture and humiliation are never boring. But its very unpleasant. And when all is said and done, what is the point? Absolute power corrupts? Yeah OK, but we've had that moral/message about 10 times already.

The Annoying Alexander
I found Alexander very annoying this time round. His character is so pathetic, and the writers try to manipulate us into hating Parmen and his wife for bullying him. And cheer Alexander for being so cute a and lovable. Subtext? "Those upper-class Greeks may be beautiful and smart, but  they're really snooty swine,  The ugly little person, the outsider, the oppressed minority, is the only decent one in the bunch.  Its terrible, how they abuse him! 

Its such an old Trope. Remember the movie Spartacus? On one side, the nasty decadent Roman Aristos. On the other hand, the decent, full of life, salt-of-the-earth slaves. This is just another riff of that old tale.  

And again, what is the point? Why would they still be so nasty to him after 2,300 years? Why wouldn't any of that noble Greek philosophy and endless meditation have an effect? 

Typical Dialogue:

ALEXANDER: You think that's what I want? Become one of them? Become my own enemy? Just lie around like a big blob of nothing and have things done for me? I want to move around for myself. If I'm going to laugh or cry, I want do it for myself. You can keep your precious power. All I ask is one thing. If you do make it out of here, take me with you.

Other problems 

This is one of the lazier TOS scripts. Not only do we do "The Greeks" again (see Who Mourns for Adonis) but once again, we have a set of all powerful space aliens who have trapped our crew and need to be taught a lesson in humility.  We even get the patented Kirk "You've forgotten how to live" speech. The sets are cheap, and character development is minimal.  Alexander is the only character who shows any complexity. Parmen is an arrogant evil one-note johnny.  Philana is the same, only vain. Spock is given little to do. McCoy just protests he won't stay. Kirk is Kirk.  Memorable quotes are few. 

In addition to the 13.5 minutes of Torture porn,  we get 2 minutes of objects flying around when Parmen is delerious with fever, and another 1.5 minutes of Kirk/Parmen playing Ping-pong with a knife wielding Alexander.  Almost 17 minutes of  badly done "action". 

The Acting
Probably the best thing about the episode is the acting. Barbara Bobcock, Liam Sullivan, and Michael Dunning are very good in their roles. Too bad the story/script is so bad.

Reviewing the Reviews

Given how sensitive most Star Trek internet male reviewers are, I expected them to dislike the episode and be turned off by the sadism.  After all,  a few words of "Sexism" reduces them to tears, so all this unneccessary abuse of Kirk/Spock/Uhura/Chappell should really get them going.  Wrong!  Hey, they have no problem with it,. In fact, some of them seem to be into torture porn and only wanted Kirk to get some payback.  Otherwise, they go on and on about how great Alexander is, and hey, what about that 50 year old inter-racial kiss?

But   the  Fascinating star trek podcast has a wonderful take.   One of them likes the episode because he wants Shatner/Kirk "Taken down a peg".   And both wonder if the writer was expressing  his hatred of the two stars!

Summary:  This episode is the closest TOS ever came to trashy, sadistic sex porn. If you like seeing our heroes abused and humilated for 12 minutes or love little people, this episode is for you.  Myself, I consider it one of the worst. 

TOS - Is There no Truth in Beauty?

Plot: Dr. Miranda Jones boards the Enterprise with an alien ambassador so repulsive that the mere sight of him drives men insane.

Guest star: Diana Muldaur
Pros: Acting, Music, Direction, dialogue
Cons: weak 2nd act, lack of action.

Best Quote:
KIRK: Yes, I think most of us are attracted by beauty and repelled by ugliness. One of the last of our prejudices. At the risk of sounding prejudiced, gentlemen, here's to beauty. (they stand for the toast) To Miranda Jones, the loveliest human ever to grace a starship.
McCoy: [toasting] How can one so beautiful condemn herself to look upon ugliness the rest of her life? Will we allow it, gentlemen?
All: Certainly not.
Dr. Miranda Jones: [counter-toast] How can one so full of joy and the love of life as you, Doctor, condemn yourself to look upon disease and suffering for the rest of YOUR life? Can we allow THAT, gentlemen?

Originally, entitled "Miranda", the Star trek producers picked this script by an unknown female writer as their 5th aired episode. The Producers wanted to increase the female audience and this story fit the bill.

Its a well written, well acted, and well directed story that kept me interested. Leaving aside the absurd amount of respect that the Star Trek officers show Miranda Jones, its plot is logicial, and the dialogue is every good. Its main flaw lies in the lack of action and a weak 2nd half. There's too much focus on Miranda Jones and her feelings and not enough action, or focus on the Medusans.

The weak 2nd Act
As stated, the producers liked the script, but they needed more action. The solution was to make "Larry" attempt to assassinate Kollos, go mad, sent the Enterprise into another Galaxy and then die. The problem is we don't really care about Larry. Nor do we really care about his unrequited love for Miranda. Hey, we just met the dude. Had been played by George C. Scott, well, we might have cared, but the actor cast doesn't make much of an impression.

So, it all comes off as padding. Trying to stretch the story to meet the required run time. Too bad. Perhaps if more budget been available, an alien vessel could've attacked, or maybe Larry could've been made into a alien spy, trying to steal the Kollos for the Klingons. But as it is, we don't care about this pathetic incel with a crush on Miranda.

Diana Muldour
I can't praise Diana Muldour enough in this episode. Next to the musical score, she's the best thing in the episode. She plays her part perfectly, and has great chemistry with McCoy, Spock, and especially Shatner.

The Odd Ending
Sadly, the ending of this episode is almost ruined by some bad editing. The episode SHOULD have ended with Spock's line " Live long and prosper, Miranda." Instead, for no good reason, we cut to Kirk who absurdly says "Peace", and then we get a reaction shot of Kirk, without his visor. Good God, what was wrong with the editor/Producer ? Talk about a "tin ear". The Director felt the same, and never did another Star trek.

Reviewing the Reviews
I read and listened to many reviews of this episode on the internet, and I was shocked. You can take the stupidity of the "Elanne of Troyius" reviews and multiply by 20. Almost all the reviewers are male. You get the impression they don't really like a "chick episode" and cover for it by sreeching "sexism" at the top of their voices.

Or maybe I'm giving them too much credit. Maybe they're so stupid they think that men can't admire a woman's beauty without wanting to hop into bed with her. Or they're OUTRAGED that a man could compiment a coworker for her stunning good looks.

For example, The Dinner scene (that I've quoted) litteraly drives them mad. One would think they'd just saw Kollos without a visor. Anyway, the officers involved, escpecially McCoy behave in a Gallant fashion. And McCoy ooze ol' Southern gentelmenly charm. (note: I assume the respect shown for Dr. Jones, isn't just for beauty, but for her accomplishments as a pyschologist). Do these internet reviewers/podcasters pick up on that? Nope. To them McCoy and the others are just sexist pig-dogs who want to rape Dr. jones back in her quarters!  In other words. men can only do two things with women:

1) Treat them as "one of the guys" who fight, work, and think like men
2) "Chat them up" in order to have sex with them.

Otherwise, its SEXISM!

DS9 - Duet

 Duet is commonly thought of as one of the Best DS9 episodes, with good reason. The acting is top  notch (especially Harris Yulin) and the writing is very good.  Yet, when it came time to buy the episode,  I just couldn't pull the trigger.  I thought about it, and I think I know why:

1) Duet really isn't 24th century science fiction.  Its a thinly vieled "Holocaust" story. The Cardassians are Nazis. The Bajorian Labor camp is Dachau.  Kira is the Jewish Nazi Hunter seeking justice. One could take the script, change a few names, and produce it as a straightforward TV legal drama.  In fact, many of the internet reviews treat this episode with a seriousness/reverance usually reserved for "Schindler's List". 

And that's the problem.  Leaving aside histories and novels, we have numerous documentaries,  films, and TV shows,  addressing the REAL Nazis, concontration camps,  and war crime trials,  Why do we need a SF TV show, supposedly set in the 24th Century, dealing with the same situations and the same moral dilemmas? Especially in a thinly disguised, 2nd hand way? 

2) Its much worse on Rewatch.  Once you know that Harris Yulin is the file clerk and just pretending to be the Big war criminal, then all the time spent in the episode discovering that, is rather dull.  And that's most of the episode.

3) I don't watch DS9 to get despressed.  Too much of the episode is an unpleasant retelling of Bajorian suffering in the concentration camp.  Or Yulin's character creepily boasting how he "exterminated the Bajorian Scum".  Who wants to watch that more than once? 

4) And it doesn't really have a point. It doesn't really affect the DS9 story arc. It doesn't really expand our understanding of the main characters. Yeah, maybe Kira learns not to be so self-rightous and  jump to conclusions. Or maybe tone down the Cardassian hate.  But even that's not clear - because a couple episodes later and she's still hating the Cardassians.  Its really a stand-alone episode. 

5) I didn't buy the whole premise.  So, a file clerk (drafted into the Army) feels so guilty about war crimes he didn't commit, that he changes his appearance, and deliberately tries to get arrested, convicted, and executed?  That seems unbelievable and overly dramatic.  In other words, Fake. 

6)  I've never bought the Cardassian need for concentration camps, forced labor, or the starvation of the Bajorians. In the 24th century, the Cardassians wouldn't need to use manual labor to: mine minerals, process ore or grow food.  They have spaceships, replicators, and advanced machinery!  And they could easily punish the Bajorians by wiping out the whole planet with a push of a button.  There was no need for them to get their hands dirty by setting up labor camps and slowly exterminating them.

At the same time, the "backward" Bajorians find it incredibly easy to get sophicated bombs and explosives. Where is that technical knowledge coming from? They're supposedly a Century behind the Cardassians, and a peaceful people.  

Star Trek III - The Search for Spock

Enjoyable follow-on to Wrath of Khan. A pleasant ride, if not as good as the previous movie. Despite a realtively large budget, the film comes off as a well-done TV episode. Good to see that Sulu gets a few good lines, and Uhura has more face time than usual.  Rating ***

Bobby Fischer Against The world (2011)

Superficial HBO documentary about the life of Bobby Fischer. I suppose if you know nothing about Fischer this might be interesting. I found it rather dull. 93 minutes long, and I should saved time and read his wikipedia article. Its nice to see photos of Bobby, and hear little snippets from people who knew him, but so what?

The documentary refrains from judging Fischer's actions or going into the merits of his decsions.  For example was the US Government justified in chargng him with a crime for playing chess  in 1994 Yugoslavia or pressuring the Japanese Government to jail him in 2004? Nor does it delve into Fischer's complicated attitude toward Religion, or Jews or his love life.  After 1980, he's just written off as "Wacky" - y'know like all them nerdy chess players.  

Nor does address why Fischer was a Chess Genius. Its as if you did a Tiger Woods documentary and never talked about Golf. 

Rating **

Game Change (2012)

Plot: HBO Docudrama about Sarah Palin and the 2008 McCain POTUS campaign - based on the book of the same name.
Stars: Woody Harrelson, Julianne Moore, Ed Harris

Well done political hit piece on Sarah Palin released by HBO on the eve of the 2012 Presidental Primaries. Well acted and cast, the movie purports to be an accurate representation but of course isn't. Absurdly, Steve Schmidt, a medicore, selfish, political consultant (with dubious ethics) is made the hero of the story, and we see it all through his eyes.

Like any skilled piece of propaganda, the movie doesn't really lie, it simply leaves a lot of the truth out, and presents only one side. All the interactions between Palin and Schmidt on based on Schmidt's self-serving story of what happened. Played by Woody Harrelson, Schmidt is always the smartest man in the room, and also the most concerned about ethics and the country. If Palin does anything good, its because Schmidt had coached and told her what to do. If Palin does anything bad, its because she's failed to listen to Schmidt, or gives into her natural inclination to be lazy and dumb. For example:

• Palin gives a good convention speech. But that's only because Schmidt tells Palin what to say and how to say it.
• Palin holds her own in a TV debate with Biden. Why? Because Schmidt has Palin memorizes 40 minutes of Schmidt talking points so she can hide how dumb she is
• When Couric makes Palin look bad in a long interview, that's not because ABC edited the interview to make her look bad, or asked endless "Gotcha questions", no its because Palin refused to properly prepare as Schmidt demanded.

The hero worship of Schmidt reaches its highpoint at the end. Palin wishes to give a concession speech, but Schmidt will have none of it. He literally pulls the plug on her camera, and thunders that "He will not have the historic election of an African American sullied by self-serving speech by a VP candidate"

All the hero worship is required because Schmidt is the primary source for these Palin bashing scenes. He must be presented to the audience as the "Good Guy" so we will side with him over Palin. However this isn't really the whole truth.  Examples:

• Schmidt is shown at the very start as "saving" McCain's campaign after giving him sage advice on the "Surge". The movie presents the idea that McCain and Schmidt are very close and he's the man in charge. In fact, McCain and Schmidt barely knew each other, and Schmidt while running the campaign on a day to day basis, he was still working under Rick Davis. Further, McCain was constanly recieving advice from both John Weaver and his speech writer Mark Salter.
• Schmidt's attitude toward Palin is arrogant and patronizing. And Palin's refusal to take his direction is shown as petualant and childish. Left unmentioned is that Palin had been a popular state Governor for over 20 months. Why should Palin have been so respectful to an obscure Political consultant?
• Palin, correctly, didn't want to go on SNL.  However, Schmidt convinced her that she could gain votes by being a "Good Sport". 
• Palin had wanted to start out by doing the Limbaugh show, Sean Hannity, and conservative talk radio. Schmidt however demanded she start out by doing hostile interviews with liberal network anchors. 
• Also left unshown is Palin's incredible popularity with Republican voters and her massive, successful, campaign rallies and ability to raise money. None of these are shown.

Also note that while Schmidt is shown as super-ethical, in reality both he and Nicole Wallace were leaking anti-Palin information to the press. And according to others, Schmidt more or less gave up 10 days before the election, and spent most of his time at home or enjoying himself. This, along with divulging campaign secretes caused McCain to freeze him out. The two men only spoke twice in the 9 years from 2009 to 2018. Schmidt has now admitted he lied about McCain's affair with a lobbyist and didn't even vote for McCain!

DS9 Far Beyond the Stars - Sisko Dialogue

 Sisko/Benny Dialogue in the "Incredible tales Magazine" office (before the breakdown):

• -Who's winning?
• -... the matches? I gave them to you.
• The latest Galaxy
• I'll think of something.
• I suppose I'm sleeping late that day, too.
• What about James Baldwin, Richard Wright, Zora Neal Hurston, Langston Hughes? Ever heard of Native Son?
• Wishing never changed a damn thing.
• I'll try to remember that
• I did. Surprised?
• Why not?
• What's wrong with that?
• Easy.
• But I want people to read it now.
• But that's not what I wrote.
• What about my story?
• Lately, I've been asking myself the same question.
• What's that?
• I think it's better than chalk on the sidewalk...
• I'm okay.
• A novel -- congratulations! Robots? 
• He can't do that!
• And what's that supposed to mean?
• You still haven't said what he didn't like. The artwork? The layout? Exactly what "high standards" is he talking about?It's about my story, isn't it? That's what this is all about. He didn't want to publish my story -- and we all know why. Because my hero is a colored man.
• That doesn't make it right and you know it.
• You're firing me?

Sikso/Benny Dialogue With the Police (Two Scenes)

• That's my drawing.
• I work here.
• In there.
• It's a drawing of a space station. See -- it's not worth anything, except to me.
• What happened?
• (re: Jimmy) I know him -
• Is that why you shot him? For breaking into a car?
• A crowbar?Is it here?

DS9 -Far Beyond the Stars - Racism

 After rewatching Far Beyond the Stars  I wanted to document all the racist actions/words:

Act I and  Act II

• Benny is told not to show up for the Magazine photo shoot.  Pabst doesn't want the readers to know Benny is black because  People aren't going to spend money on Negro Writers.
• Benny is called "Boy" by a policeman, and hassled about where he works and how he could afford a nice suit.

Act III

• Baseball star Willie Hawkins says White people don't want him living next to them, they can barely stand him on the ballfield.
• Willie says Whites don't admire him, just think he's  a colored boy who can hit a baseball.
• Darlene is surprised Benny wrote such a good story
• Pabst says a Negro space captain in unbelievable and the audience won't accept it. He won't print the story. If benny wants the story published the Captain must be White.
• Jimmy says Whites would only let Black people in space to shine their shoes.  As far as Whites are concerned black people will always be N-worders. 

Act IV

• Pabst agrees to print the story, but only if its presented as  a dream by a Negro boy.
• The two detectives shoot Jimmy dead for breaking into a car. 
• When Sisko tries to view the body the police shove him away, when Benny lunges at them, they hit Benny with a sap and  "beat the hell out of him" despite please of "You're killing him".

Act V

• Pabst tells Benny that the Publisher has pulped the Monthy Magazine with his story. When Benny asks if it was due to his story,  Pabst refuses to deny it.
• Pabst tells Benny, he's fired.  Publisher directive. When Benny gets agitated,  Pabst says he'll call the police if he doesn't stop shouting. They haul away Benny to the Mental hospital.

DS9 - Far Beyond the Stars - Acting

Odo/Douglas Pabst - Puts in the best acting job of the DS9 cast - and has more screentime then anyone except Sisko. Rene Auberjonois uses his normal voice and does an excellent job as the put upon Editor of "Incredible tales Magazine". Whether its delivering the bad news, being the boss, or bickering with Herb over dougnuts, Rene is always likable, intelligent, and grounded in reality. Grade A

Herb/Quark - Its great to see Armin Shimerman without the makeup. Like Auberjoniois he's completely believable in his role.  Here he's the obnoxious. left-wing Herb. Its a wonder that no one has beaten him to a pulp. Grade A-

Gul Dukat/Policeman - Meanacing and forceful Marc Alaimo shines in the brief 5 minutes he's on screen. He's almost unrecongizable without the Cardassian makeup. Grade A-

Weyoun/Policeman - Jeffrey Combs takes a different approach from Alaimo, and makes his policeman a little more sterotypical, with a hint of parody. Grade B+

Worf/WIllie Hawkins - Michael Dorn is bland and boring in a role that gives him almost nothing to do. Dorn fills up the time by smiling and talking about his Baseball exploits and how much White fans resent him. He's definitely much better as Worf. Like Auberjonois he uses his real voice. Grade C-

Jake/Jimmy - Sporting an odd look and pencil mustache, Cirroc Lofton simply doesn't have the acting skills to improve on a cliche: a bitter street hustler with a grudge against white people. Bascially its OK actor + mediocre dialogue =  mediocre result. Grade C-

Kassidy Yates/Cassidy - Penny Johnson delivers a great performance as Benny Russell's girlfriend. She's much better here than on DS9 pretending to be Starship Freighter captain. Maybe the role was closer to reality and easier for her to play. Grade B+

Bashir/Julius - As the quasi-sophisticated English husband of Kay, Alexander Siddig isn't asked to do much more than throw out a few witty remarks and look good holding a cigarette, but what little he does, he does well. Grade C+

Kira/Kay - Playing a 1950s version of Kira isn't much of a stretch for Nana Visitor. Kay has a different dress and hairdo, but she's still a strong, intelligent, and forceful woman. She's married to Bashir, and is the most sympathetic toward Benny. Grade B-

Martok/Roy - Unrecognizable without his Klingon makeup, J.G. Hertzler gives a satisfactory, if brief performance as Incredible Tales Magazine's bluff, cigar-chomping Art Director. He makes the fifth white male characters who smokes. The only two who don't - are Herb and Douglas. None of the women or the black characters do. Grade C+

O'Brien/Albert - Colm Meaney  is one of the best DS9 actors, but he really fails in this one. Partly,  its having to play an  introverted, slow talking, writer.  But Meany overdoes it, and completely fails with a bogus 'murican accent.  He also deepens his voice and exaggerates the pauses in the script for  no good reason. The closest thing to friend Benny has in the office.   Grade D+

Sisko/Benny Russell - And now we get the most important actor in the espisode, Avery Brooks. As usual, he's a tough man to evaluate since he's such a mixture of good and bad. We can start with the Bad.  Brooks' "Breakdown" at the end is the worst piece of overacting, I've seen on Star Trek - and that includes all the Bill Shatner Ham.  Brooks hyperventilates, huffs and puffs,  whispers, yells, and goes up and down an octave before crying and collapsing. 

But then this ties in to his problematic acting throughout the series.  Charismatic, full of "Command Presence", and with a distinctive pleasant voice, Brooks is excellent when he's barking out orders, getting angry, or just engaging in normal conversation. But when he's called on the express any deep emotion - (other than straightforward anger or joy) , or engage in any subtlety or nuance he fails completely.  In this episode he tries to portray  a milder, more intellectual character - but he goes to the extreme and makes him wooden and too quiet.  In a way, he reminds me of Kirk Douglas, able to play a few notes within a certain range with talent, but completely failing outside it.   Grade C-

Joe Sisko/Preacher -  Played by an excellent actor, Brock Peters, he's given an impossible task with some incredibly stilted dialogue (cf: I have a dinner date with my Grandson) as Sisko's father, and some absurd rants as "The Preacher".  I give the Peters a B Grade for his acting, but both characters are so terribly written,  the overall grade is lowered.  Grade C

Dax/Darlene - Terry Farrell gives a fine comic performance as the gum-chewing, bubble-headed secretary. Too bad she didn't get more lines.  Grade B-